tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20292939552346483632024-03-04T23:10:00.658-08:00platanosandmangoes.com(photo by:emily hernandez © 2011)platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.comBlogger57125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-20289069145556843402014-11-10T07:04:00.001-08:002014-11-10T07:26:09.068-08:00An original story<div sab="167">
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<span sab="172" style="font-family: Calibri;">“It’s not fair, it’s not fair.” The hot tears flowed down
her face as she and her husband received the news most couples do not want to
hear. The Doctor explained once again why carrying a baby would be impossible
for her. They had hoped, they had done everything right and here they were
faced with the reality that having a baby was not for them. They felt it was so
unfair and wondered why they were going through this. Ryan and Megan had been
the ideal couple all along. They met in church and their courtship was so
sweet. It was genuine and when they married it truly was
a celebration. They taught in Sunday school and often times were told that they
were going to be awesome parents one day. Now, here they were being told they
would never become parents. It was more than Megan could bear and she often
wondered if she did something wrong or if God thought she was not worthy to be
a Mother. Time went on and their church started an Adoption Support Group. They
hesitantly attended a meeting and soon realized that they were not alone in
their heartache. Some of the couples were there because they too were not able
to have a baby. Others however, were there because they had more love to share
and knew there was a need. With time they became comfortable with their group
and soon friendships were formed. Whenever a couple would adopt ,everyone else
in the group became an Uncle or Aunt. When their turn came to adopt they could
hardly contain the excitement. Megan would spend hours on Pinterest looking at
baby décor and parenting tips. They posted a “due date” on their Facebook and
began preparing for this new baby. She began to sew a baby blanket and like
most things on Pinterest, the finished product was not exactly like the one
that prettily sat on her page. One side had rain drops and the other side had
clouds. As they grew closer to their adoption they received the phone call that
certain things had happened and unfortunately their adoption would not go
through. They felt as if they had been taken to the very top of the world only
to be dropped. Once again they were brought to the edge of sorrow. The bright
baby room that had begun to take shape was now a dark and painful reminder that
there would be no child to fill it. She would sometimes sit in the rocking
chair she had refinished and would weep into the blanket she had sown. Her
husband did not know how to comfort her. He truly believed that the Lord had
promised them a child and did not doubt that the promise would come to pass.
Megan was not so confident and her pain during that time was greater than her
faith. As the months went by they once again began to get back to normal life.
They stopped attending the Support Group at church, and decided to focus on
serving in other areas, areas that did not involve children. They chose to
volunteer with the teen group and Megan secretly hoped that they would be “cured” from wanting
kids. During the summer the teen group was invited to volunteer by visiting an orphanage for a week. They were asked to bring gifts for the children in shoe boxes. It reminded Megan of the Billy Graham shoe box ministry. Megan and Ryan had participated in the shoe box ministry from the
time they were married. In fact, in the previous year she had chosen to make
boxes for babies and had given all the items they had saved for their own baby,
she even threw in the funny little blanket she had sewn. She remembered the day
that she and her husband had packed the red and green shoeboxes. It was a
mixture of joy and tears. When she folded the blanket and closed the lid her
husband whispered “things sown in tears shall reap in joy.” That was enough for
them at that moment. They
volunteered to go on the mission trip besides, most of the other adults had other kids to tend to and family obligations.
Whereas Megan and Ryan, as usual, had only themselves. The months that followed
were filled with planning and prepping for their trip. After signed permission
forms, and immunizations shots they were finally on their way to the orphanage
with 10 teens in tow. When they arrived they were greeted by worn, but joyful
workers. They were given all the information as far as children in the
orphanage and the rules which they would need to abide by during their visit.
As they unloaded the food and supplies they’d brought with them Linda, the Head
Missionary, informed that it was a good thing they arrived this week and not
last week because, they did not have running water the week before. Megan smiled and
said “oh it would be fine” but deep down inside was grateful they would not
have to go without running water during their stay. After their first day the
teens got to work and began to play with all the children. The children in the
orphanage ranged from 2-16 years of age and they always enjoyed visitors. They quickly fell into routine with the kids at the orphanage.
They gave the staff a night off by showing movies to the kids and provided
popcorn and snacks. The staff was grateful for the few hours of rest they would
be given and all the children behaved because they knew not behaving meant early
bed time and missing out on a fun movie. That evening one of the Staff members
fell sick and could not sleep in the room with the little ones. Megan offered
to take her place and soon found herself in the room with the 2-5 years olds.
She laid there and thought, how funny, the age group she’d been running from
was now all around her. She prayed with the kids and put them in bed. As soon
as they were asleep she crept outside to quickly say goodnight to her husband. <span sab="179" style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They stood out for just a moment because the
cold Mexican air was more than either one was prepared for. He gave her a hug
and told her she was “One hot momma” to which she quickly replied” I’m not a
mom remember!” and all he said was “one day” and kissed her good night. <span sab="180" style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She crept back into the room and was thankful
that all the kids were asleep. It had been an exhausting day and was happy to
sleep in a bed, instead of a sleeping bag. She laid her head and was soon
asleep until a shriek abruptly woke her. She jumped out and turned on the lamp.
One of the little ones, Jose, had a bad dream and was crying. She called for
one of the staff who quickly ran in and explained that he had experienced a
traumatic event in his young life and often had nightmares. “La colchita, la
colchita por favor.”<span sab="184" style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Soon one of the
kids ran and grabbed a blanket from a drawer and gave it to him. It was the
only thing that comforted him so that he could fall asleep. Soon the commotion was
over and she saw little Jose sniffling with his eyes closed and a blanket
wrapped around his little arm. <span sab="185" style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of a
sudden, her heart stopped. Tears filled her eyes as she saw the blanket that
this little boy clung to. “Lord, how is it here???” she wondered to herself.
For there it was, her raindrop blanket, her Pinterest mishap, now wrapped
around this little boy, hundreds of miles away from her home. She felt the
whisper of the still small voice “things sown in tears, shall reap in joy.” She
knew, she knew right away what that meant. As she looked at little Jose with
his dark hair and his little brown fingers clinging to the blanket she knew,
this was the little boy they were intended for. She silently sobbed as she
kissed his forehead and struggled to sleep. Throughout the night her mind was
flooded with doubt and the “what if’s” that can haunt us all. She retraced all
her steps that brought her here and could not shake the providence of it all.
She wondered if truly this would all come to pass. It seemed like the morning
would never come. As the children awoke, the staff came in to get the children
dressed and ready for the day. Soon the teens were cooking
breakfast for everyone and it would not be till the late afternoon before she
had a moment with her husband. She could not wait to share with him the events
of the previous night. They walked up a little trail on the property as she
told him about this little boy and the blanket she had made. Ryan was silent as
he listened and it seemed to her that he was going to say no. But, he looked at
her and said “let’s pray.” They held hands as they both prayed for Gods Will in
the whole situation, they didn’t even know if this little boy was available to
be adopted. They approached Linda about the possibility of adopting Jose. She listened
to them as they spoke and she guardedly warned them to make sure this is
something they wanted to do and that it was not an emotional moment that
brought them to her office. They told her their whole story and how they were even
certified in the States to adopt. She explained the procedure and then began to
share little Jose’s story. He had been brought to the orphanage by the
equivalent of Child Protective Services several months before. His Mother had been
a field worker and often times would take him with her to pick fruit from the
fields. He had no father in his life and when his mother died tragically he was
brought to them. When they asked further about the bad dreams she simply said
that little Jose had seen his mother die and often times at night he dreamt of her.
The little blanket had arrived in one of the Christmas Shoe boxes the prior
Christmas and so they kept it in a drawer for him. Linda prayed with them and informed
them he was available for adoption but, decided it was best to say nothing to
Jose until things were finalized. Megan and Ryan were allowed to spend their
last day getting to know little Jose and they were both surprised by how open he
was to them. It had just been a couple of nights ago when Jose was a frightened
little boy and here he was all smiles. It filled them both with hope and they
fell in love with him. The teens had packed up all their backpacks and sleeping
bags onto the van and were ready to get back home where hot water was the norm.
Ryan and Megan hugged Linda and told her they would be back in a month to visit
and asked if they could Skype Jose so they could get to know him better. She
hesitantly said “yes, but we’ll take it slow.” When they arrived back home they
went to see their friends from the Adoption Support Group. For months they had avoided
everyone, and though everyone understood they were glad to see them once again.
They shared all that had happened and the mixture of tears and smiles was
overwhelming. One of the couples in the group was Mexican and had offered to
walk with them through the process and even offered to give them lessons in Spanish.
The months once again flew by and soon they were on their way to pick up little
Jose. When they pulled up to the Orphanage they could not believe that it was
truly happening. They quickly prayed before they got out of the car and walked
in with the hopes that this time, this time it was going to happen. Once the
state official signed the Adoption Papers they were allowed to take Jose with
them. The children were happy and sad to see Jose go, they understood that they
would probably not see him again. Ryan and Megan promised the children that
they would bring Jose back for a visit. Linda with her salty gray hair hugged
them both and was relieved to see this couple was genuine about their love for
Jose and more importantly for the Lord. Jose had already become accustomed to
them because of their weekly Skype visits and he was happy to have a Mama and Papa.
Yet when it was time to say goodbye he wept in Linda’s arms. Linda wiped her
tears along with Jose’s and gave him the blanket that had comforted him all
these months. She kissed his little brown face and told him to be a good boy.
With blanket in tow, Jose walked away with his new Mom and his new Dad. Here
the very blanket that had been a stark reminder of what Megan and Ryan did not
have, was now coming back to them with this precious little boy. They buckled
him in his car seat and drove away. <span sab="189" style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After driving for some time, Ryan glanced back
at Jose who was now falling asleep with his blanket wrapped around his arm. Then
he looked at Megan and said “things sown in tears” and before he could finish she
quickly responded “shall reap in joy”. </span></div>
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<span sab="172" style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p sab="190"><span sab="2026" style="color: #990000; font-family: Times New Roman;">This year we are participating in the Operation Shoe Box Ministry through Samaritans Purse ( A Billy Graham Ministry) and I could not go back to sleep this morning so, this story came to me in my insomnia. Hope you enjoyed it! If you're interested in participating in the Christmas shoe box ministry you can click </span><a href="http://www.samaritanspurse.org/what-we-do/operation-christmas-child/" sab="169"><span sab="2028" style="color: #38761d; font-family: Times New Roman;">here</span></a><span sab="2029" style="color: #38761d; font-family: Times New Roman;">.</span></o:p></span></div>
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platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-46524368295945232032014-09-22T22:06:00.001-07:002014-09-22T22:06:52.353-07:00comfort in an uncomfortable situation<div sab="166">
I moved to Texas a few months ago and through a series of events I had planned a trip to AZ for this coming week. Unbeknownst to me the Lord was "planning" Pa Chiscos' final trip home just a few days before my arrival. Pa Chisco is my oldest sons Grandfather. (you can read more <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2013/08/saying-goodbye-to-memory.html" sab="168">here</a>)Because of the fact that I will be in AZ I am able to attend his memorial service, which is very special to me. I have known the family since I was a teenager and along with my son we will join the family in honoring his memory. Funerals often stir up different emotions...sorrow for the loss, joy for the time you had and unfortunately sometimes the unsettling feeling called regret. For me the regret comes in a second hand form. I regret that my son was not able to have the relationship he should have had with his Grandpa. Along with the comfort of attending the funeral there is the small issue that arises which can potentially create uncomfortable feelings as well. It presents itself to be a situation that requires some delicate caution. I called my son and we discussed the "situation". He had already considered the possibility and decided to attend the memorial service regardless of who may or may not be there. His response to my probing on how he felt about seeing his biological father was pretty straightforward."Mom, he has ignored me my whole life I doubt it will make a difference if he continues doing what he's always done and ignores me there as well." His tone was not harsh or angry, it was clear and concise. The fact that he does not harbor love for the person who chose not to be present in his life is ...well...to be expected. But, the fact that he does not harbor ill will for them to me is amazing. He is not stricken with bitterness or anger towards them. I'm so proud of him for not being that way. I made a conscious effort not to fill him with my own personal feelings towards that person ( though trust me I have some strong opinions about them) I knew the truth was ugly in and of itself and felt no need to "sway" my sons heart concerning his biological father. It was always left for my son to decide how he felt about him. When it's all said and done the focus truly is to join the family in saying goodbye to Pa Chisco, I am saddened by the loss. So with peaceful minds we are preparing to attend the service and the way in which E-man is handling it all ,to me, is the best way he can honor the memory of his Grandfather. </div>
platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-84297017396662683772014-05-23T06:07:00.001-07:002014-05-23T06:33:08.770-07:00two ceremonies intertwined... from birth to graduation<div sab="166">
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<span sab="168" style="font-family: Calibri;"><span lang="EN" sab="169" style="color: black; font-size: 11.5pt; line-height: 107%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI"; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri;">Today I have the
amazing privilege of attending my Birth sons High School Graduation(you can read more about that <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2009/11/scarlett-letter-of-adoption.html" sab="171">here :).</a> Yay! I’m
excited for him and I can't believe how quickly this has come. As I
booked the flight for our trip I considered myself so fortunate to be able to
attend his graduation. This is one of the moments I thought I would miss when I
chose to place Evan for adoption. I walk in such gratitude that his
parents have welcomed me into their lives the way that they do. Even more so
that Evan wants me to attend the graduation. Earlier this year when his mom and I were discussing
our final traveling plans ,she mentioned that ,during the graduation ceremony, Parents hand
the diploma to their student (not the faculty) and invited me to join them
on stage when their turn comes to present him with his diploma. Immediately
tears filled my eyes as I considered being on stage with them. I
initially said no because I felt that they should be the only ones on stage,
since they are the ones who have raised him. After all, I was just happy to have
the opportunity to sit and watch him receive his diploma and cheer from my seat.
However, she quickly insisted that I too have played a role in his
life and that he would want me to stand with them. That was enough for me
to accept the offer. I started thinking about the fact that for a few brief
moment his parents and I will stand on stage with Evan. It took me back to the
last time all four of us stood in front of an audience almost 18 years prior
for what we called an “Adoption Ceremony”. We held the Ceremony at their church
and there were just a handful of people present. Their Pastor and a few others
who had in one way or another supported us through the adoption came to offer
up their support once again. I held Evan in my arms as his adoptive
parents and I stood together on the stage along with their Pastor. Evan was
just a tiny little newborn and I cradled him in my arms as
their Pastor shared some scriptures and prayed with us. I then read a Poem
that I had written to his parents about how I was entrusting them to raise
Evan. There were so many tears that day and at the end of the ceremony I
placed Evan in his Mother's arms. She in turn handed him to her
husband and clung to me as we both wept. We had no idea how open our adoption
would eventually become or even how much we would be involved in each other’s
lives. I'm excited
about seeing Evan graduate and it’s amazing that we are able to share this
moment in his life. That moment on stage represents everything coming back full
circle. His parents have fulfilled their promise of raising him in the way he should go, Evan is on his way to becoming an amazing man, and I am blessed...truly blessed to see it all. </span></span></div>
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platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-79909350806813172582014-05-20T01:00:00.002-07:002014-05-20T01:00:48.283-07:00the new I knewWe're headed out in just a few hours...I'm flying out of state to visit my birth son and his family for his graduation(will be sharing about that in a few days) but, I wont be coming back. I will be flying into a new state, new town and into a new home(one we have not see in person btw). Usually when I hear the word "NEW" I get excited...new dress, new car, new shoes...new new new new new new York(sorry Doctor Who reference).Albeit I'm excited about our future, but I'm also having such a hard time saying goodbye to the life we have known here for the last 20+ years. I grew up here, got married here, established our roots here, made such wonderful friends here. Right now "new" does not sound so appealing, and I know it's the heaviness in my heart that is saying that because I'm wanting to stay close to all that I love. I've had so many "new" moments here and I was able to share them with my family and with my friends...I saw many of my friends get married here, have their babies here. I want to be a part of all the new things I see happening here like my cousins son starting High School or my sister in law having her first baby. Yet I know that it is time for our family to go and experience an unknown "new". I was talking with my youngest about the heartache associated with this move and told him that it hurts so bad because we have been so blessed with awesome friends and family. I wish they all could go with me and see the things we will see and be there for all the different things we will experience. I know technology will make it easier to stay in touch, but it's not the same as getting in the car and driving over to someone's house and talking face to face. I do have One that goes with me and He is the One that will get us through this new season in our lives. In fact I'm comforted to know that His mercies are NEW every morning....that "new" I can live with, in fact that "new" I can't live without! platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-59468756896387088332013-12-09T13:22:00.000-08:002013-12-09T13:22:11.577-08:00I may be a future candidate for Hoarders!<div class="mbs _5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" sab="2687">
This was my Facebook status today: "anyone else get emotionally attached to things in the home? We bought a new printer during black Friday ( more like cyber Friday for us) and I've had my other printer for 8 yrs... I'm actually sad to see it go..it's been through a lot with us..from Jr. high school reports, to taxes, to high school assignments... fare the well my hp printer....and welcome home new hp 3510"</div>
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How crazy is it to get so used to things ,that it makes you sad to see it go? Our printer which was once a scanner, copier, printer has now become.. a no scan, copy, and barely print printer... I have held on to it for as long as possible because the cartridge is refillable and I cannot pay $50 for ink...it is crazy to me. So, when I saw that it was on it's last function I knew it was time to replace it and with all the black Friday deals on printers we couldn't pass up the opportunity. So, I have this brand new hp printer sitting on my desk and I feel sad to put out the old and bring in the new. How strange to even think about the length of time we've had our old printer and all that it has been through. I can remember when we purchased it, we were only married for a few years and our kids were little. It really has survived 4 teenagers, a toddler, and a man who would bonk it on the head when it wouldn't work right! I know it's silly to even have these feelings, but I am grateful that the printer lasted as long as it did. I'm not trying to store up treasures here on earth so don't worry, if you come over to my house you won't see a collection of broken items in my garage( actually I may have some stuff in there right now that needs throwing). <span class="p" sab="85"><br sab="86" /></span><span class="versiontext" sab="88"></span> I wonder if this is how Writers felt when their typewriters would clunker out? </div>
platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-53421660093081575492013-10-27T20:30:00.000-07:002013-10-27T20:43:28.772-07:00When my life was a mess, God sent me a widow<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I was nervous driving up to the house on the hill. When we
pulled into the dirt road I noticed a small pond in front of the porch. A thin
white-haired, blue-eyed woman greeted us at the door. Her name was Zella and
she attended the same church that my <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/search/label/adoption">birth son’s</a> parents attended. Nancy, my son’s adoptive
mom, had shared my situation during a prayer meeting at church. I needed a place
to stay for the remainder of my pregnancy and wasn’t sure where I, along with
my 2 year old, could go. After the prayer meeting Zella approached Nancy and
offered her home. She had recently lost her husband and had the space in her
home (as well as in her heart) for a broken 19 years old and her toddler. I was
nervous and curious about meeting her. She knew nothing about me except the
fact that I was placing my baby for adoption and that I’d already had a child.
My circumstance was not an ideal one at all. I waddled into her home where she
invited us to sit in the back yard. She brought a tray out with lemonade and
cookies. As she brought out the tray I noticed one of her arms was a bit
paralyzed and she walked with a bit of a sway. She immediately set me at ease
with her soft spoken manner and her gentle wrinkly eyes. She asked a little
about me and she shared about how her husband Ernest had passed away 6 weeks
prior. At the end of our meeting she offered my son and I a temporary home. She
had a fruitful garden near the front of the house and it seemed so peaceful
there. I was relieved to have a temporary place to stay. I didn’t know it at
the time, but GOD had sent me to the home of a widow for my provision. Emmanuel
and I moved in with Zella and she would cook meals for us and I would watch her
make a salad with things she had grown herself. I was impressed with how she
knew so much about so many things. After staying there for a few weeks she
played a cassette tape of her husband’s funeral. We both sat in the kitchen and
quietly listened as one by one people spoke of her husband. At times she would quietly
wipe her tears and at other times she would smile. I was sad for her and at the
time thought to myself how fortunate she was that they lived to be married so
long. After the tape ended she went on to share how they had planned to do things after his
retirement and all that changed when suddenly he was gone. Besides
cooking and keeping a home, Zella showed me unconditional love. If she ever had
an opinion about my life choices she certainly didn’t treat me with any
disapproval. She treated me as if I was an important guest and not a teenage
girl in chaos. As the day approached to have the baby she was the one who
helped me with Emmanuel. When I returned home from the hospital I was able to lock
myself in the room and just recover emotionally as well as physically. She
quietly tended to Emmanuel and would bring me food on a tray. I would lay there
weeping and she gave me the space to do that. When the time came for me to
move back home I left with a deep appreciation for Zella. I admired her, she was
no longer this grandma that opened her home, but she represented what I wanted
to become. A loving, upright woman of high character. To me she embodied Proverbs
31 all the way through. As the years went on and I grew up I was proud to call
her and share with her my victories. When I went to visit my birth son for the
first time she was there. A few years ago I went back to visit my birth son and we were able to have lunch with Zella. She had gotten older, moved
a little slower, and had added a few more wrinkles around her blue eyes. Her
gentle manner was unchanged as well as my admiration for her as a woman of God.
Today, I got the call from Nancy informing me that Zella had gone home to be
with the Lord. I admit that I am sad at the loss for such an amazing woman. I am
so thankful to the Lord for allowing our paths to cross, especially at a time
when I can honestly say my life was a mess. I’m thankful to Zella for showing
me His love when I desperately needed it. I can say that she had an influence on my relationship with God. She loved the Lord and it was evident in the manner in which she lived. I'm thankful, so thankful for this amazing woman!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Proverbs 31:<span class="text"> 30-31 Charm <i sab="862">is</i>
deceitful and beauty <i sab="863">is</i> passing,</span><br sab="864" />
<span class="text"><span sab="865">But a woman <i sab="866">who</i> fears the <span sab="867"></span><span class="small-caps"><span style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span></span></span><span class="text">, she shall be praised.</span></span><br sab="868" />
<span class="text"><sup sab="870"><span id="en-NKJV-17316" sab="869"><span style="font-size: x-small;">31 </span></span></sup>Give
her of the fruit of her hands,</span><br sab="871" />
<span class="text"><span sab="872">And let her own works praise her in the gates.</span></span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-38025313325819561132013-08-12T13:14:00.000-07:002013-08-12T14:50:02.528-07:00Saying goodbye to a memoryLife is complicated. It is and some of those "complications" in life are often times intermingled with sweet and not so sweet things. When my son Emmanuel was born, I was a teen mom. His biological father chose not to be a part of his life however, the rest of the family did. E-man's Grandparents were very sweet and visited him in the hospital when he was born. They have over the years seen him ( not as often as they would have had his Bio Dad chosen to be there) but still there has been some interaction. For E-man the connection is a little harder because his Grandparents for the most part speak Spanish (although his Grandpa " Pa Chisco" knows how to say the phrase "you got a girlfriend?" perfectly in English) For me,I have always felt a special love for his Grandparents. I met them when I was a teenager and got to know them while I dated their son and they were there in the early years when I was a single mom. E-man's Grandma " Ma Chewy" and I have felt a special connection with each other and she has donned me with the title " honorary Daughter in law." I have to say it again, life is complicated. So that is the backdrop of our relationship. Several months ago I took E-man to visit his grandparents. I was taken aback when I saw Pa Chisco. He had gone through serious health problems that left him somewhat frail. When I greeted him he didn't give me a hug right away but rather gave more of an introduction of himself. I at first thought he was joking around, he was always a bit of a prankster. As he settled into his recliner, the realization of how much he had changed was settling in with me. His hair was pure white, he was much thinner and moved much slower. Yet, there was a calmness to him. Alzheimer is a tricky disease, he reflected the memory I have of him, but in turn there was no longer a memory for me to reflect. Once he knew E-man was his grandson he started talking with him about working, Pa Chisco was always a hard worker and he encouraged E-man to do well at his job, work hard so he could make money and get girlfriends. I laughed when he asked E-man if he had a girlfriend to which E-man replied," no" to which Pa Chisco replied "No you don't have A girlfriend, you say you have two girlfriends." Last night I received a message from one of E-man's Tia's letting me know that Pa Chisco is not well and we should probably go visit him. I called Ma Chewy and she gave me an update which included letting me know the Alzheimer's Disease had progressed even further as well as other illnesses. E-man and I are planning to go visit them. I doubt that Pa Chisco will know who I am, I doubt he'll know who E-man is but, we know who he is and that is reason enough for us to visit them. When I met this family in my teen years I didn't realize how quickly we would be here, where the years and illnesses start taking things away. It doesn't seem like I've known them for over 20 years but, I have. I could not sleep last night, my heart was sad. I'm sad because I could hear in Ma Chewy's voice the hurt she is feeling seeing her husband go through the physical struggles. I'm sad because there is a mourning that happens with Alzheimer's where the person is there but, you feel you've lost them already. I'm sad for E-mans Aunt's who have to prepare to say goodbye to their Dad. I'm sad for E-man because he didn't get to know them as well as he should have been able to and now I see that the time is coming to a close. When we're younger we think we have all the time in the world and as I am starting to get older (cough, cough did I just say that???) I am seeing how quickly time is passing. I cannot wait to see them. I look forward to sitting in their living room. I may have a little ache in my heart when we see them, but I will also feel the love and that is enough.platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-32809911095439857022012-05-30T12:27:00.001-07:002012-05-30T12:28:03.733-07:00My graduate, my son<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_0Wt-Rt3WrfVlcFgrr-3yzE5ZwsqgiigOXFZvZod7a-KlrD8ceUFlA5nE4trgJbps28knKnEXc7WeVKftaP6z9KL_MKMvm6WjaLtKfv_gPgKfJwpuNK9Y0T4ysUqnHtP7yDVQmCuJ_Ek/s1600/DSC_0058.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_0Wt-Rt3WrfVlcFgrr-3yzE5ZwsqgiigOXFZvZod7a-KlrD8ceUFlA5nE4trgJbps28knKnEXc7WeVKftaP6z9KL_MKMvm6WjaLtKfv_gPgKfJwpuNK9Y0T4ysUqnHtP7yDVQmCuJ_Ek/s320/DSC_0058.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Congratulations Emmanuel!</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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My son graduates from High School tonight. If you’ve read
this blog you know the ride has been anything but smooth. We’ve had our <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/search/label/teenagers">ups</a> and
<a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2011/01/self-inflicted-wounds-are-still-wounds.html">downs</a> with him and worried many nights, which way he would go. He turns 18 in
just a few days as well. When I look back I had him at 18 years old! When I
turned 18 I was focusing on getting things ready for a baby and I was facing
the reality that I needed to grow up quickly! He on the other hand is looking
at his life without the urgency to grow up. I’m thankful for that, I’m glad his
experience is exactly what it should be. He has the freedom to ponder his
options and enjoy this new chapter in life. I’m looking forward to it as well.
I’m preparing for this evening with balloons, banners, and food. On the inside
though, I’m taking in the moment and sighing with relief that we are here
today. That he is going to have his name called, walk down and receive his
diploma. It is a family accomplishment as well; keeping him focused when he did
want to flake out was no easy feat. We arrive here in this time with him
because we journeyed and labored with him.
I thank God for giving us the strength and endurance to get to this
place. </div>
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Dedicated to Emmanuel Eli Hernandez a.k.a my brown boy </div>
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My graduate, <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2010/06/we-both-became-older-today.html">my son</a></div>
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Yesterday you were a baby</div>
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Yesterday you were one</div>
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Yesterday has come and gone</div>
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You were my little son</div>
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<br /></div>
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Today is almost finished</div>
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Today is almost done</div>
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Today you are my graduate</div>
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A young man , still my son</div>
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Tomorrow you may have new endeavors</div>
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Tomorrow who knows what comes</div>
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Tomorrow seems so far away</div>
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Yet, you will always be my son</div>
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*participating in the Pour out Your Heart Wednesday, you can read other stories <a href="http://thingsicantsay.com/">here</a> as well!</div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-15949495332150239252012-02-15T08:49:00.000-08:002012-02-15T09:18:31.357-08:00Red lipstick+Walker=Love!<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><i></i></span><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVZ56OynIlF0xsR3aZKFiZhYpHgC7M1YVUGfz9vmiJjzvZNt5FiH3ouztXF2VWXpgyDuWekq_bMnrRPIV2DLY4z7IQlcZQbwas0dLJsj0aMXeYNH9QnrtrJtl0iaNFr0vAYl1vwnJUn8A/s1600/restaurant+table.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVZ56OynIlF0xsR3aZKFiZhYpHgC7M1YVUGfz9vmiJjzvZNt5FiH3ouztXF2VWXpgyDuWekq_bMnrRPIV2DLY4z7IQlcZQbwas0dLJsj0aMXeYNH9QnrtrJtl0iaNFr0vAYl1vwnJUn8A/s320/restaurant+table.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">(Image from <a href="http://www.123rf.com/photo_1780803_black-and-white-image-of-a-small-and-charming-restaurant-table-in-provence-france-this-image-has-a-f.html">123rf.com</a> )</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<i><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><i><br />
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<div style="display: inline !important;"><i><i style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><i style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><br />
Last night my husband and I went out for a Valentine's Dinner (which involved asking my friend to give one of our kids a ride home from work, getting someone to hang out with the 8 yrs old and having to double check where the eldest would be AFTER work!). Whew...once we got that established we headed over to Olive Garden where apparently the entire city also chose to eat (so it seemed anyway by the PACKED parking lot, outside benches, and inside waiting area) When we walked up to the Hostess booth she smiled at us and after getting our information told us it would be an hour before we'd be seated. We were cool and decided to hang out near the couches (in hopes that someone would eventually get called and we could swiftly shift ourselves into position, without appearing like that's what we were doing). When a couple offered their seats to us we gladly accepted the offer and were thankful we didn't have to slip and slide our way into the seats. We "couple watched" as we waited and tried to figure out if people were recently dating,married or how long they've been married. It killed time for us and about 50 minutes later our buzzer went off! We quickly went to the hostess booth where we overheard the hostess tell a sweet little old couple (seriously they must have been late 70's/early 80's) that it would be a 70-minute wait. I looked at my husband who was already motioning me to follow the quick stepping server when I motioned him to come back to me. Before I tell you what happened next, first let me describe this couple. She was wearing a very appropriate Valentine's Day outfit with red accents on her skirt and a big red flower on her blouse; which matched her ruby red lipstick just right, all of which was framed in her silver walker. The gentleman wore a nice brown suit and stood tall over his thinly framed wife. So, when the couple heard how long the wait would be she said "oh sure I guess we'll go ahead and wait!" I looked at my husband who by now was looking at this couple and offered our still flashing buzzer to them so that they could be seated in our place. The couple seemed happy to take it but, it was the server that was originally going to seat us who had now come over to us that really took it all in. She looked at this couple as she smiled at us and we went back to our original look out spot by the couch. We eventually worked our way back onto the couch and instead of "couple watching" we "couple pondered" this sweet elderly couple! I can't imagine how many Valentine’s Days they've already shared or how many they even have left. They were the best looking couple in the restaurant and I hope one day to look that good in my walker with my sweet old hubby by my side!</i></i></i></div><br />
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<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><i>(participating in the Pour Out Your Heart Wednesday with Shelly check it out! <a href="http://thingsicantsay.com/">Here</a></i></span>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-91769524350651564912012-02-01T06:19:00.000-08:002012-02-01T06:26:17.306-08:00iPhone,aye me<span style="font-size: medium;">Last night we were installing a new wireless router (with the assistance of my step-daughters aunt) anyways, as we were setting it </span><span style="font-size: medium;">up she would periodically attempt to log in to the wi-fi through her </span><span style="font-size: medium;">iPhone</span><span style="font-size: medium;">. It was a success! (woo hoo!) Once we established a connection we then set up the password. She</span><span style="font-size: medium;"> attempted to log in again just to make sure the password was done correctly. I watched as she got her </span><span style="font-size: medium;">iPhone</span><span style="font-size: medium;"> and she explained that in order to connect to the wi-fi she had to delete the previous connection, re "search", and then reconnect. She did the same thing on Christy's phone (Christy is my eldest step-daughter) and when I watched her the second time I just sat in awe of the simple process. Reason being is that my husband and I have been looking for a new home church. We have been "searching" for quite a few months now and just recently found a church where we both feel comfortable to stay at "for now". I do find myself treading VERY cautiously as we attend this new church, after all it's filled with sinners! (Joking! not really church is filled with us imperfect people.) I find that I am very guarded and am struggling with trying to connect with anyone there. So, last night when we were checking the connection through the </span><span style="font-size: medium;">iPhone</span><span style="font-size: medium;"> I saw how easy it was to just press a couple of icons, delete previous connection and browse for a new one. I laughed at how "human" technology can be and how we as humans cannot connect to our future or even our "present" without in a sense "deleting" the connection to the past. It brings to </span><span style="font-size: medium;">remembrance a verse in the Bible, and I'll leave you with that verse now.</span><span style="font-size: medium;"> </span><br />
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Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.<br />
Isaiah 43:18-19<br />
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( Participating in Pour out your heart Wednesdays, with <a href="http://thingsicantsay.com/">shelley</a>, check out her blog as well!)<br />
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<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Corbel, Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><b><br />
</b></span></div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-82554856567495824122011-12-09T21:49:00.000-08:002011-12-09T21:49:50.688-08:00Savings on savingsOkay, I NEVER use my blog to promote anything except what I share BUT, with Christmas around the corner and the dollar being stretched till it's practically see through I wanted to offer this website to others as I've been enjoying the benefit of purchasing gift cards at half the price. The fine print is that you will not get it as quickly as they say ( that's been my experience) but they have made good on my orders and I have used my giftcards already so I can "safely" share this with you. The website is savemore.com they have National Deals as well as "local" deals. I just bought a Papa Johns Gift card for half the price and we order from there frequently(especially since my son works there!) Here is my referral link http://svmr.co/LyXw I do get credit if you order but I've not used my credit yet so that is one area I'm not so sure about. Anyways, Merry Christmas and I hope this information helps!platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-78911279302617691882011-11-16T17:59:00.000-08:002011-11-16T18:07:02.738-08:00Table for 20<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8CAb2IrCNiin-enxUXpNQsjyDxPVMJStCrAFBhwdKnKx9v4w1oliOCm8Qy5rE7sy4XNkyLlF0ZDc0bXjrFEnUr-MkE4V3sJpIGZ_38fCKIi3nDWRtuWcQWysSoY0U7eWYKZYplyu6zwo/s1600/black+and+white+table.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="212" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8CAb2IrCNiin-enxUXpNQsjyDxPVMJStCrAFBhwdKnKx9v4w1oliOCm8Qy5rE7sy4XNkyLlF0ZDc0bXjrFEnUr-MkE4V3sJpIGZ_38fCKIi3nDWRtuWcQWysSoY0U7eWYKZYplyu6zwo/s320/black+and+white+table.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">(image respectfully from sonalimangal.com</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
A couple of weeks ago I had planned on going to California to visit with a Tia who was diagnosed with cancer and who would soon be reaching the end of her journey. To my surprise (along with the rest of the family) she passed away sooner than we'd anticipated. That led to me making the trip in honor of her funeral ( not my first choice, I'd rather see the person and talk with them!) It was bitter sweet, I was so glad to be with the family and loved the opportunity to reconnect with family members I'd not seen for several years. After the service we all gathered at a restaurant to spend more time together. We took several photos and I savored each moment. In the back of my mind I wished my mom , along with my other Tia's who have passed away, could have all been there. They would have truly enjoyed the sight of five tables being pushed together and the noise that came from such a crowd. I enjoyed the amount of space we all collectively held for that time. The next day I asked my husband to take me back to that same restaurant ( hey the food was very good) The tables and chairs had all been returned to their respectable places. I looked at that space and felt it to be empty compared to the night before. We too have all returned back to our respectable places to continue functioning in our places yet,the beauty of being able to come together as a family and inhabit that time was a gift. Thanksgiving is soon coming and as we host that day we'll be adding an extra table for those coming together. These tables hold a space for each one of us and as some of us leave our seats ( like my mom, my aunts..) others join (through marriages ,babies....) From the "kids table" to the " too cool teen table." I look forward to sharing my little space with those around me for however long God permits.<br />
Psalm 23:5 " You prepare a table before me........"<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;">platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com is participating in pour out your heart wednesdays graciously hosted by <a href="http://www.thingsicantsay.com/">thingsicantsay!</a></span>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-33507251492572611472011-04-13T06:10:00.000-07:002011-04-13T06:28:02.777-07:00What is a christian? Please Respond!The Christian Experiment...<br />
<br />
With recently re-entering the workforce I personally challenged myself not to share my beliefs or my faith with anyone at my job. I do this with the purpose that I'm hoping people will see a difference based on my work performance and attitude. I want to be a light (or as I tell my 7 yrs old ...a flashlight) and a light is something you see with your eyes and not necessarily "hear with your ears." Although I do believe if the door is open for a discussion, there is an appropriate time and approach to any topic. I am usually comfortable sharing what I believe in and why I believe it but, this approach for me was a challenge where I was able to really ask myself " Will people know I am a Christian without me having to say anything?" I take that train of thought with a quote from Billy Graham who said "share your faith, and if necessary use words". I really wanted to share it first by my actions and then (and only then) if there is an open door share with my words. So, I propose the question to all.<span style="color: #073763;"> What does it mean to be a Christian?</span> I know a question like this can spur on some intense emotions and all I ask is that whatever your opinion is , you share it constructively. Please respond in the comment section. Thank you! (<a href="http://thingsicantsay-shell.blogspot.com/">participating in Pour out Your heart through thingsicantsay</a>!)platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-76260400006069454492011-04-10T08:43:00.001-07:002011-04-10T08:48:15.919-07:00Walking through the walls of water<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">Lately I’ve been pondering the escape route the people of God took when they left <country-region><place>Egypt</place></country-region>. It wasn’t a quick thing that took place when they left. I imagine a weary people clutching to whatever they had as they stepped in fear and exhaustion. After all,the days prior to their leaving their work was doubled and the things they saw must have put them in such a state of stupor. All of this is reflective of course yet when we decide to leave our lives representation of <country-region><place>Egypt</place></country-region> we experience perhaps those same fears and exhaustion. I imagine as they began crossing the sea with their captors behind them yet the unknown before them that they did it in silence. They walked away from the impossible, through the impossible, into the impossible. At one point though their silence did turn into praise perhaps there when Moses began singing they understood that they were truly free. What joy must have befallen them to know that neither they nor their children would have to mortar another stone for Pharaoh. I sit here this morning beginning my own song, I’m seeing that God is still the God who works on our behalf and in my own version of <country-region><place>Egypt</place></country-region> (I have many) He has brought me through. I’m grateful this morning and end with the lyrics from Moses song. “The LORD is my strength and song, and he is become my salvation: he is my God…”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Exodus 15:2</div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-7858076818275291432011-03-29T07:23:00.000-07:002011-03-29T07:28:33.662-07:00is all really all?This past weekend I attended a women's retreat. It had been at least 4 years since I attended a retreat(excluding my WWGG retreat,but that's a different story all together). I was in a cabin where I didn't know most of the women which can make you a little nervous but, by the end of the weekend I had truly felt like I got to know more of them than had I simply seen them every Sunday. Anyways, the theme of the retreat was ,seasons and how each season applies to a relationship with God. The first night the focus of the study was how He makes all things beautiful in it's time, I've heard that verse quite often and it was even the verse we had for our wedding !(yeah) But in previous times my focus on that verse was the word "beautiful" and was caught up in the romance of how God makes things beautiful and isn't this wonderful, blah blah blah. Not that those things are not true ,but again for our wedding that was the verse and even the song I walked down the aisle to. Yet here I found myself sitting at the retreat rehearing this verse and finding myself asking God "really?, really Lord can you make ALL things beautiful?" The word "all" is well ALL of it! I have alot of "all" in my life that needs some serious beautifying. Is it possible really? I sat there and felt that pinch in my heart because I doubt that ALL of the ugly in my life can be made not just different, but beautiful still. I in my head "know" the answer is yes but, confess that in my heart the fear of hoping for it causes me to be wary! And yet, I know I need to trust Him for the "all" after all, He is the all in all!platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-9368544508540789022011-03-24T21:32:00.000-07:002011-03-24T21:32:26.056-07:00My First Day<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">(wrote this almost two weeks ago but just now am posting!!)</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">My first day</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
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I’m getting ready for my first day of work. I’ve got my clothes ready, I’ve got my directions, I’ve got everything set up as much as possible. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">I’m in a new place, starting a new job entering a new season. With all these “new” things I hope to leave the old things behind and pray that they can truly be passed away. I’m a little nervous about all these changes but I keep my focus that these “new” things are for the purpose of something specific being made new. So, with this new season I have my own personal anthem,<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I know I’ll be getting ready for work with this song playing to remind myself that this isn’t my final destination nor is it my final purpose, I have not “made it” by any means but, I am on my way.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/yU2drg8FtBg?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt; text-align: center;">There's a better version of me <br />
That I can't quite see <br />
But things are gonna change <br />
Right now I'm a total mess and <br />
Right now I'm completely incomplete <br />
But things are gonna change <br />
'Cause you're not through with me yet <br />
<br />
Chorus: <br />
This is a redemption's story <br />
With every step that I'm taking <br />
Every day, you're chipping away <br />
What I don't need <br />
This is me under construction <br />
This is my pride being broken <br />
And every day I'm closer to who I'm meant to be <br />
I'm a change in the making <br />
<br />
Wish I could live more patiently <br />
Wish I could give a little more of me <br />
Without stopping to think twice <br />
Wish I had faith like a little child <br />
Wish I could walk a single mile <br />
Without tripping on my own feet <br />
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Chorus: <br />
This is a redemption's story <br />
With every step that I'm taking <br />
Every day, you're chipping away <br />
What I don't need <br />
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</div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-43069316991163545252011-03-16T10:19:00.000-07:002011-03-16T10:19:00.474-07:00The cat and I<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">So today was freedom day for the cat! We’ve had her for a week and the poor thing has spent the majority of that time in the garage (by her own choosing) I figured she liked the garage better because it was cooler in there than the house and with all the stuff in there she could hide herself if she felt the need.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So today we slid open the back door and prayed as she walked out that she would not run away. My son and I decided to grab a blanket and make an evening of it so as the day set into the evening we enjoyed the coolness of the night. It was intriguing to watch the cat explore the back yard, especially since she’s been crying every night to get out. She slowly stepped out and began her inspection of the space. She once in a while would look at us and then she would proceed. We sat out in the back for about 40 minutes with her and<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>laughed at her silliness, we especially thought it<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>was funny when she heard the next door neighbors horse I mean dog ( it’s a marmaduke dog!) bark. Her back arched so high and she became stone still, it was too funny. Eventually she relaxed and proceeded with her inspection of the place. I was amazed at the difference from the last time she went outside (she escaped on the first night) I remember trying to coax her out of the neighbors shrub and her only response was a hiss! She is an all together different cat today, so relaxed and comfortable in this new environment. It took her a whole week which in people time would be ummm…scientifically, made-up about 2 months in people time. Of course this observation hits me because I’m still in the “hiding out in the garage phase.” But, I hope just as the cat felt secure enough to explore that I too will eventually be ready to proceed (with caution of course). Anyways back to the cat, after watching her for a while we felt pretty sure that she would not run and decided to go inside the house. She reappeared in the house about an hour after us meowing at me because I had moved her food bowl to the backyard! <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I got the message and moved the bowl back into the garage, once I did that she sprinted towards it. Who does she think she is anyway! She’s not the boss of me (or is she????)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I chuckled as I heard her “crunch, crunch, crunch” through her meal and closed the back door. Two hours of exploration was good for her first time out there and I figure tomorrow we’ll let her out again especially now that we know this truly is her home!</div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-19111625242834153842011-03-09T12:04:00.000-08:002011-03-09T12:05:54.909-08:00From the wire to the groundI have officially walked the <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2011/02/tissue-paper-thin.html"><span style="color: red;">high-wire</span></a> and I am glad to say that I made it safely across! I am gently stepping onto the platform and a thought comes to mind I now need to take the steps to get back to solid ground. I prepare to take my first few steps down and freeze for a moment. Questions fill my mind about what is to come, what will be required of me, and more importantly what will happen when I get there? I try to look down to get a glimpse of whats next but, see only the step in front of me and nothing more. Perhaps that is best, as it puts in place natural blinders which keep me from looking to the right or the left. It keeps me from running as I don't know which direction to take except for that one step, and if I could see the end result I would surely try and find a shortcut to it rather than walk the course I need to walk. So here I go step by step and I remember it says "He directs my steps "and not "He shows me the whole picture and tells me everything!" (I wish it did) I'm thankful, very thankful in fact that I'm not alone and that He has brought me through thus far!<br />
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( you can read my first entry about this high-wire <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2011/02/its-high-wire-act.html"><span style="color: red;">here</span></a>)platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-3514474295434478882011-03-07T07:58:00.000-08:002011-03-07T07:58:00.958-08:00The weeded heart<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Recently, I was in the backyard pulling weeds, actually we all were. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>While we were pulling weeds our handyman was also in the backyard busy fixing the back window. After a while of pulling weeds he walked over and said “you know if you wet the soil it will soften so that the weeds will glide out instead of you having to yank them out.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I realized what he was saying was<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>true because as I was pulling weeds I noticed that areas where the soil was softened the weeds were very easy to pull and came out all the way down to the root. In contrast areas where the soil was hard the weeds were almost impossible to pull.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I continued pulling the roots out I started thinking about the roots the Bible warns against, root of unforgiveness, root of bitterness, root of fear, and so on. I know the Bible says “do not let any root of bitterness ….. But today I realized that these roots the Bible speaks of grow as naturally in our own hearts as they do in the earth. Like the weeds in my backyard they must be pulled out yet, in my heart God is the one who pulls the roots out. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Like the soil, it is easier when our hearts are softened. Which got<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>me thinking even more because when I would tug on one of the weeds and it wouldn’t give way I would simply move on to the next. Especially when I know all I have to do is water and wait for that soil to be softened. I wonder, does God wait just the same? <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Does He patiently wait till our hearts are softened so that our hearts can give way to the process? I know the answer is yes; God not only waits for my heart to be softened, but takes the time to water me as well. I go back to pulling the weeds and ponder these things in my heart.</span></div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-86881287217609198212011-03-02T19:52:00.000-08:002011-03-02T19:57:14.652-08:00right as rainI have been going through the ringer ( yes even after making it across that high-wire!) BUT I listen to this and it soothes my soul in so many ways and Not just because this is my birthson ( although I am very proud of Evan). So, take a moment and listen to him pour out his heart through his music!<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><object class="BLOGGER-youtube-video" classid="clsid:D27CDB6E-AE6D-11cf-96B8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0" data-thumbnail-src="http://0.gvt0.com/vi/CbQBFVeIL_A/0.jpg" height="266" width="320"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/CbQBFVeIL_A&fs=1&source=uds" /><param name="bgcolor" value="#FFFFFF" /><embed width="320" height="266" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/CbQBFVeIL_A&fs=1&source=uds" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed></object></div><br />
Great job Evan!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://thingsicantsay-shell.blogspot.com/"><img border="0" l6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheG1XGEzoWaNwlkY8ck6cn_Sw2J6dSeqeWcNaf4vUjkdNxY-f9OhdhGJImyr6odPRKEfEriG48EzG3oacGpRpK2vbpt5CtRh6Gh9sjR7d2Ysq7I-nAyyWKphzS63UfdUMDIloG7SfApTQ/s1600/pouryourheartout.jpg" /></a></div>* check out shell for the pour out your heart wednesday blog!platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-5309970153964111992011-02-21T12:49:00.000-08:002011-02-21T13:23:08.159-08:00tissue paper thin<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKDljUcVjOP4yaoz5BvloSFJTY7WUkhX68tTQkNb6uHNHGh08lG1oZBPFk7O50QEcPRifnIyI0T-Lcgc-DtpX7hgtDVH1qMN5p1C8VZnieSVMBZZc9PwFrbiAxBOqjyXixaGMMKchqXzw/s1600/breathe+photo+001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="249" j6="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKDljUcVjOP4yaoz5BvloSFJTY7WUkhX68tTQkNb6uHNHGh08lG1oZBPFk7O50QEcPRifnIyI0T-Lcgc-DtpX7hgtDVH1qMN5p1C8VZnieSVMBZZc9PwFrbiAxBOqjyXixaGMMKchqXzw/s320/breathe+photo+001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">This past weekend I began experimenting with tissue paper. I was at my cousin's house the week before and saw that their son Josh had made something similar to this,with the use of tissue paper and stamps. (Josh did an awesome job!) <span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I made</span> three pieces this past weekend, but this last one was for me. I put it right at the entrance to my bedroom. When I walk by and see it on my wall I'm encouraged because I feel as if my strength is about as strong as the tissue paper I used to make this and yet here is this completed picture. Last week I wrote about <a href="http://platanosandmangoes.blogspot.com/2011/02/its-high-wire-act.html"><span style="color: #76a5af;">walking on a tight rope</span></a> and I am smack dab in the middle of this high wire act. Fear and peace ensue every step. I literally have to remind myself to breathe through it, which is in part why I created this piece. So, this morning I saw my friend <a href="http://wellofcreations.blogspot.com/2011/02/hints-of-hope_21.html"><span style="color: #a2c4c9;"><span style="color: #76a5af;">Robin</span> </span></a>had posted on <a href="http://inspiration-avenue-team.blogspot.com/2011/02/inspiration-avenue-weekly-challenge.html"><span style="color: #6fa8dc;">Inspiration Avenue's</span></a> weekly challenge and decided to join in especially when the theme is hitting me so personally! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">A special thanks to <a href="http://graphicsfairy.blogspot.com/"><span style="color: #76a5af;">graphicsfairy</span></a><span style="color: #45818e;"> </span>which is where I found the majority of my clip art! </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">You can visit her site today to see all the submissions for Brag Monday!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "Boring Boring"; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: Bridgnorth; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;"><em>"In his hand is the life of every creature and the </em></span><strong><span style="font-family: Bridgnorth; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;">breath</span></strong><span style="font-family: Bridgnorth; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US;"><em> of all mankind."<b> Job 12:10</b></em></span></span></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-54083740304029270342011-02-17T16:38:00.000-08:002011-02-17T16:38:47.598-08:00It's a high wire act.It's a high wire act folks and she doesn't have a net! Let's watch as she steps foot on this wire and did we mention she's afraid of heights ha ha ha ha!! <br />
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Yes that is me right at this moment. Only those who know that I'm walking on the high wire know to watch, most are hopeful for me that I will not fall. Others walk on without so much as a hint to this daring act taking place. That's me alright, up there doing something I fear to do, doing something that may render me down to the ground. Or I may make it across, look at the onlookers and smile as I see what I just made it through. But, for now I'm holding on to the balancing beam while feeling the pressure under my foot from the wire. Is it too late to climb down and forget this whole thing? OR even worse is it too late to try and walk across? I glance down ,see no net under me yet know that I must take this next step. Those watching however see the net is so big that they fear not for my life. I not seeing how far and wide the net spreads out to, misinterpret it for the floor. I close my eyes, grip the beam and walk.platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-50559980196867809402011-02-15T05:15:00.000-08:002011-02-15T05:15:58.287-08:00no baby for Valentine's DayOkay so Friday evening my step-daughter came over ( for her weekend home) and brought with her a baby. Her home EC class was given the assignment of being parents to a baby. This baby would cry, required a bottle, diaper changes, and being held. If she didn't do these things the baby would just wail ( like at 2 and 3 in the morning hee hee hee) I am so glad she had this assignment, not because I'm worried about the choices she may make (not worried as in just normal worried like any sane parent). She even had to bring the baby to a birthday party with her which she was not happy about. Now, my SD is really great with children, she has stated that she wants to have a big family one day but after this weekend, she isn't so sure. There were moments that I'm so glad she experienced for example; I asked her to go to the store with me(hello she loves shopping) but she said it was too much hassle to leave the house with the "baby" (I concur!). Even better was when she was playing Wii and the baby began wailing, she was mad that it interrupted her game! This assignment is one of those "there should be a law" type of things because I'm telling you this was a great experience for her. I remember teaching an abstinence class the week after a group of students did the "baby" assignment and these kids were so eager to hear about how to NOT have sex! Yesterday around 5 a.m. I heard a cry and thought it was my 7 yrs. old, well when I got up I saw my SD feeding the baby for the last time, Needless to say I wasn't able to go back to bed!(grrr bad baby, bad baby) So, I stayed up with her and just watched as she got herself ready in pink in honor of Valentine's Day. We chatted and she was so excited because for Valentine's Day she didn't have to take care of a baby anymore. I think being able to turn in her homework assignment was probably the best Valentine's Day gift she received!.....<br />
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For Valentine's Day I dropped off a big Valentine's bear balloon with a gift, I just think it's important to have that public display of love from us. I remember being in Jr High and High School and some Valentine's Days I had a boyfriend who would give me presents and some years I walked around empty handed. I'd rather her hands be filled with our love rather than some random boys version of his!platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-69563816764679305842011-02-09T21:09:00.000-08:002011-02-09T21:24:24.208-08:00follow the follower? <br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheG1XGEzoWaNwlkY8ck6cn_Sw2J6dSeqeWcNaf4vUjkdNxY-f9OhdhGJImyr6odPRKEfEriG48EzG3oacGpRpK2vbpt5CtRh6Gh9sjR7d2Ysq7I-nAyyWKphzS63UfdUMDIloG7SfApTQ/s1600/pouryourheartout.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; cssfloat: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" h5="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheG1XGEzoWaNwlkY8ck6cn_Sw2J6dSeqeWcNaf4vUjkdNxY-f9OhdhGJImyr6odPRKEfEriG48EzG3oacGpRpK2vbpt5CtRh6Gh9sjR7d2Ysq7I-nAyyWKphzS63UfdUMDIloG7SfApTQ/s1600/pouryourheartout.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">participating in pouroutyourheart<br />
sponsored by <a href="http://thingsicantsay-shell.blogspot.com/">thingsican</a>'tsay@blogspot.com</td></tr>
</tbody></table> <br />
<div class="GBThreadMessageRow_Body_Content">I accidentally “ followed” myself on blogger the other day. I was trying to follow someone else and next thing I knew it said I was following platanosandmangoes. I sat there and thought only me would me follow me. I broke down and messaged my (expert) friend <a href="http://www.wellofcreation.com/">Robin </a>on the matter. At first I laughed at my own crazy mistake but, as I e-mailed the question to her (hey robin, how I do stop following myself?)... just then it really hit me deep. Suddenly this silly thing I did took on a whole new meaning and I began to ask myself the very same question I had just asked her. How do I stop following myself? How do I stop following the old emily who has become more fearful than fearless? How do I stop following in the footsteps of places I’ve already treaded because I’m too afraid to make new prints? It knocked me off my feet(no pun intended, OK well maybe a small one). When and why did I give up the freedom to be who I was intended to me? How do I get back to that once free girl who did things like move to Mexico for 5 months to go serve at a school for deaf children. Where is that girl who truly believed that where God guides He provides? After all, I say that I am a follower of Jesus and that I trust Him. But for sometime now I find that the footprints in the sand are more mine than His. I sit with this revelation and pray...because truly I want to walk not only where I dare to walk, but where God dares me to walk!" </div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2029293955234648363.post-43176688683537561462011-02-03T17:37:00.000-08:002011-02-03T17:37:39.458-08:00a spoonful of tunnel<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglc_9npS5W4YrWoc1hkOWwmPKTON3KS7XGYBtsJVW9o8EnnrQ6DMLmn6vVYUo95WOZeXkNacRLWQzPvElx2MVkJjKAJjt62i5wc1PadmOnzmlRqP7H-QWtqOQDhb7CNsCkFfhRhxTHMZc/s1600/spoonful+of+tunnel.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="205" s5="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglc_9npS5W4YrWoc1hkOWwmPKTON3KS7XGYBtsJVW9o8EnnrQ6DMLmn6vVYUo95WOZeXkNacRLWQzPvElx2MVkJjKAJjt62i5wc1PadmOnzmlRqP7H-QWtqOQDhb7CNsCkFfhRhxTHMZc/s320/spoonful+of+tunnel.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">photo by:platanosandmangoes! 2010</td></tr>
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<div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div>(I'm supposed to be doing taxes but, needed a blogging break!)<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: justify;">Ever feel like you're digging your way out of a tunnel with a spoon? Not even a sturdy spoon, but one of those plastic spoons that can't have too much pressure on them or else they'll break! I'm facing a time in my life right now where I feel like I should have a shovel and instead I have this spoon. It forces me to slow down and have patience because this will not be a feat easily overcome. In fact, I'm not sure what this tunnel will lead to, perhaps another tunnel? (smile,cringe) If that's the case I hope I'll find a shovel or better yet a bulldozer!</div>platanosandmangoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16801017216715471403noreply@blogger.com0