Monday, December 28, 2009

New Year's Resolution resolved

I was thinking about new year's resolutions and why I have always despised them so much. In the past I felt that a certain date did little motivation for modification of one's life. Yet, I feel an urgency to scribe my version of a new years resolution list. I decided to google new years resolutions for ideas and found that #1 on the list is weight loss ( should be #1 on my list as well, but it's not) #2 is stop smoking,woo hoo I'll begin with this one since I don't smoke. Now that I've said what is not on my list let's look at what is. I have certain goals in mind such as writing a book and getting said book published. You know, nothing too lofty here. I did tell my friend today that I had a future goal of moving to Oahu, Hawaii and working as an extra for the various movies and shows filmed there. She laughed ( as did I) but I thought to myself, this is something I would like to do. My list does not hold a due date of December 31st, 2010, rather these are things I would like to accomplish in my lifetime. Watching the New years Eve ball drop from Time Square is squarely on my list. Also on my list is becoming more organized, if only.I do have a wedding to attend in a few months and seeing as how I'm a bridesmaid losing weight is something I'd like to do so I'll add it to my list(what a statistic I am!). I also would like to complete a few more classes for school and continuing the blog is on my list, hey it's cheaper than therapy! It seems that as much as I've grinched the idea of new years resolutions, this year I embrace it. I realize now that the list can represent hope for things to come, it represents clarity of mind to actually write,type, or tweet the various things we wish to accomplish. I do prefer the old fashioned method of writing the list. I am writing this list with the understanding that I am not promised any certain length of time on this earth so I best get to work on my list. I look forward to seeing how much I do get done in a year but again, I do not hold myself to a deadline. So, in just a matter of a few days I'm going to crumple up this year like an old paper and gladly bring out a new crisp year to write on, with erasable pen of course.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Nature Vs. Nurture-Adoption conclusion

I woke up this morning and blogged in my mind, is that normal? I haven't blogged since I returned from visiting my birth son's family so, here I am at 5:36 a.m. ready to write. First, being able to visit with my birth son's family truly was an incredible gift we all were given. I felt like I had won the golden ticket and was able to see what many birth mom's don't get to see, the inner workings of their birth child and a week in their lives. With all that said my birth son's Mom and I had a running joke between us throughout the week based on the theory of Nature vs. Nurture. In way layman's terms-those that live in the camp of Nature tend to believe that most of who you are is predetermined by your DNA. Those that live in the camp of Nurture claim it is your surroundings that make you who you are. I happily set my tent up in between both camps and for a very good reason I'll have you know! For the week that I was there I observed my birth son doing things that had nothing to do with his surroundings but were very much associated to the biological side of the family. For example, breathing...I'm kidding. I really did see that and so did his Mom. I also observed certain things about him that had everything to do with the way he has been raised and made a list. For example, when I heard him playing music he wrote I knew that was nature. When I heard him play music with his bodily functions I knew that was nurture. Throughout the week I would so humbly point out which qualities were nurture and which qualities were nature. His mom did find it amazing that anything crude and rude came from nurture while good grades, musical talent, and politeness came from nature. Truth be told I did see things in his personality that were starkly resemblant of my side of the family and believe that our hipcode (DNA) not only attributes to our physical appearances but can also attribute to certain aspects of our personality! Yet, what I also believe and ultimately the reason for which I chose adoption is how you are nurtured, your environment absolutely influences who you are and who you will be. Yes we are born with certain color eyes ,perhaps certain allergies and even certain personality traits but, all that is just the stuff you're born with and does not necessarily define who you are or who you will be. We can look into our own lives and see how our surroundings have impacted us. I can also see how my birth son's family has impacted him and for that I am thankful!

p.s. while I was blogging my husband walks into the room and says " are you blogging!" to which I replied "No" ( especially since he is being so kind to take the kids to school in order to let me sleep in echm echm). Then he said " don't lie to me I see on your screen it says platanosandpoochie"( poochie is a slang we use for the word flatulance). I told you he's a crazy mexican!
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