Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Nature Vs. Nurture-Adoption conclusion

I woke up this morning and blogged in my mind, is that normal? I haven't blogged since I returned from visiting my birth son's family so, here I am at 5:36 a.m. ready to write. First, being able to visit with my birth son's family truly was an incredible gift we all were given. I felt like I had won the golden ticket and was able to see what many birth mom's don't get to see, the inner workings of their birth child and a week in their lives. With all that said my birth son's Mom and I had a running joke between us throughout the week based on the theory of Nature vs. Nurture. In way layman's terms-those that live in the camp of Nature tend to believe that most of who you are is predetermined by your DNA. Those that live in the camp of Nurture claim it is your surroundings that make you who you are. I happily set my tent up in between both camps and for a very good reason I'll have you know! For the week that I was there I observed my birth son doing things that had nothing to do with his surroundings but were very much associated to the biological side of the family. For example, breathing...I'm kidding. I really did see that and so did his Mom. I also observed certain things about him that had everything to do with the way he has been raised and made a list. For example, when I heard him playing music he wrote I knew that was nature. When I heard him play music with his bodily functions I knew that was nurture. Throughout the week I would so humbly point out which qualities were nurture and which qualities were nature. His mom did find it amazing that anything crude and rude came from nurture while good grades, musical talent, and politeness came from nature. Truth be told I did see things in his personality that were starkly resemblant of my side of the family and believe that our hipcode (DNA) not only attributes to our physical appearances but can also attribute to certain aspects of our personality! Yet, what I also believe and ultimately the reason for which I chose adoption is how you are nurtured, your environment absolutely influences who you are and who you will be. Yes we are born with certain color eyes ,perhaps certain allergies and even certain personality traits but, all that is just the stuff you're born with and does not necessarily define who you are or who you will be. We can look into our own lives and see how our surroundings have impacted us. I can also see how my birth son's family has impacted him and for that I am thankful!

p.s. while I was blogging my husband walks into the room and says " are you blogging!" to which I replied "No" ( especially since he is being so kind to take the kids to school in order to let me sleep in echm echm). Then he said " don't lie to me I see on your screen it says platanosandpoochie"( poochie is a slang we use for the word flatulance). I told you he's a crazy mexican!

1 comment:

  1. yeah, you scared me for a bit cause my mind was going crazy with all the meaning of "poochie" that comes to MY mind and when you add a banana into the mix . . well well well . . .
    Glad you cleared that up for me.


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